During childhood, Fred Claus suffered his younger brother Nick's saintliness. Jump ahead: Fred is a fast-talking, genial but self-centered guy in Chicago looking for $50,000 to open an off-track-betting shop. When one scam goes awry, he calls Nick at the North Pole for a loan: Nick will give him the money only if Fred comes up to help a few days with the Christmas rush. After his girlfriend dumps him, Fred heads north. Santa's facing an audit from an efficiency expert, and it's not pleasant. Fred's job is to review charts and determine who's naughty and who's nice. Is there any fraternal feeling left, can either learn from the other, and what about Santa getting fired?

London based hit men Ray and Ken are told by their boss Harry Waters to lie low in Bruges, Belgium for up to two weeks following their latest hit, which resulted in the death of an innocent bystander. Harry will be in touch with further instructions. While they wait for Harry's call, Ken, following Harry's advice, takes in the sights of the medieval city with great appreciation. But the charms of Bruges are lost on the simpler Ray, who is already despondent over the innocent death, especially as it was his first job. Things change for Ray when he meets Chloe, part of a film crew shooting a movie starring an American dwarf named Jimmy. When Harry's instructions arrive, Ken, for whom the job is directed, isn't sure if he can carry out the new job, especially as he has gained a new appreciation of life from his stay in the fairytale Bruges. While Ken waits for the inevitable arrival into Bruges of an angry Harry, who feels he must clean up matters on his own, Ray is dealing with his own ...

Fatherless John Farley's youth frustration, even trauma, like many his school kids' in his Nebraska small town home, was the constant abuse and humiliation in sadistic Jasper Woodcock's gym class. After college, doting son John became a motivational bestseller author and returns during a book signing tour to receive the backwater's highest honor. To John's horror, his devoted mother Beverly announces her plans to marry the hated coach and he's to be celebrated on the same event as John. Only ridiculous fatso Nedderman and his strange brother try to help Farley stop Woodcock, but that keeps backfiring.

Incompetent car salesman Perry is desperate to get the money to release the car he hopes to sell to young Gary from the garage but his wife,fitness instructor Debbie is fed up with constantly bank-rolling him and he eventually has to sell Gary an inferior model in order to stump up the cash to pay the garage man. Just how inferior it is Gary discovers when the engine starts smoking and the car breaks down on the way home.